Thursday, July 31, 2008

lost in their overcoats waiting for the sun

I finished my term paper and ran out of ink while trying to print it. It seems strange to me that some professors want assignments submitted electronically and some prefer paper copies. I wish it was consistent. Shawn is going to get me some more ink while I go to pick up Little J from camp, so I should be able to mail the paper later on this evening. Just having it out of my hands will be a relief. Tomorrow is my final exam and I haven't spent any real time studying yet, however, I'm taking a break now since I've been working all day. I am going to have to do some studying tonight after dinner which shouldn't be too problematic since Big J has returned home giving Shawn someone to play with, and Little J has developed a fascination with my Sims game. If I can carve out an hour or two for review I think I will be prepared.


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One of C's workers from the addiction recovery centre called this morning to tell me that she had been approved to have an overnight visit from her daughter. On this I am of two minds. To begin with it scares me a little because C warps Little J with twisted values and paranoid delusions that she freely expresses. On the other hand, I want Little J and her mother to maintain a healthy connection and I hope that by having these supervised visits, C might have the opportunity to learn some parenting skills. I will see if C manages to return Little J in a positive frame of mind. With fingers crossed.

I am trying to work on learning some skills, myself, for dealing with an addict. I'm learning that I can't hold on too tightly because if I do, I end up going over a cliff with her every time she hurls herself. I need some distance and I need to allow her to make her mistakes and face the consequences of them. Even if that totally sucks. Because going loco with her sucks more.


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