vapid

I sent my paper in to my professor and am now holding my breath for the grade. I worked hard on it and I think I did well... I just hope he agrees. I'm such a different kind of student this time around than I was the first time I went to university in my early twenties. Back then I just wanted to get finished and the least effort required to do homework the better. Of course I put energy into the classes and specific assignments I found interesting but I never attacked things with the same kind of determination that I do now. In fact in those days I hated students like me, the ones who were so studious they made the rest of us seem lazy. Messing up the bell curve and all.


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Summer, in past years, has been a couple of months of alone time. Time to read and rest and think... torture myself a bit, maybe, with circular thoughts... This summer has been nothing like that. With Shawn home, Big J moved in and not working, and Little J needing a whole lot of attention and time and love... well. There's been none of the usual lazing and self-indulgence I have come to count on in the summer. I'm not sure I'll feel rested when I return to work. I'm not sure I ever did before either.

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