Wednesday, November 30, 2005


Winter is all about static electricity. The car door zaps me every time I get out of the car. My hair stands on end when I pull my sweater over my head. The puppies zap each other when they run across the carpet and then sniff each other. ZAP! Nose to nose, sparks fly. I don't like winter for a lot of reasons.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Dangerous Clots

The man on TV just told me that no matter how formidable I may be, I am no match for a Dangerous Clot.

Sunday, November 06, 2005

Don't you put me on the back burner

There are things I need to do that would be more important than missing the things and people I have lost.

Like... I need to keep trying to find an out of the house job. I was wrong about working at home. It doesn't work for me at all.

I need to quit wasting the time I do have. I waste it now, waiting, wishing, searching. Instead, I want to use the time productively. To write.

When this damn cold finally passes, I want to get back to working out. A few missed days makes me feel like I can never do it again.

I want to start eating. I keep skipping breakfast and lunch when I'm alone because there's no one to eat with. I want to stop that, and do better at eating properly.

I want to be a better housekeeper. I don't want to be an obsessive housekeeper, but I want to try harder to keep things under control. There's no reason, with all this time, for it to be any other way.

Maybe this can help. With the guilt, the boredom, the loneliness.

Careful what you wish for.

Friday, November 04, 2005


The first one of the year. Little sparkly bits floating before the headlights when I drive to pick him up from work. It's nighttime so early. It's winter so early. It's October so late. What am I going to do?

The Hours

I have no self-discipline.
I need deadlines.
I need a paycheque.
I need a harried boss nagging and hassling me.
I need a spanking.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

That's all

Things were easier when I was grown up.

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Ah October

Ah, October, there you are. You're late.

I'm not stoic. I'm not devoid of the human tendancy to exaggerate and embellish. But some things are simple.

October is later this year.

I have lost someone dear to me.

I miss the way things were.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Home for a rest.

It's nice to be home. I've had enough of the cat hair and cigarette smoke.