But maybe it just takes a small reminder to recall the times I have recognized it like a childhood friend. Oh right, there it is, truth. (Thank you for that.) Perhaps being willing to wander means being willing to get lost sometimes, and so it must also mean trusting in one's own sense of direction. And having a friend who will point the way helps too.
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I finished and adored Enduring Love by Ian McEwan. Loved the way I unquestioningly believed Joe's narration for the first third of the book, and then painfully began to doubt him. I love the unreliable narrator (and consider myself one at the best of times), and loved watching his credibility crumble. Loved feeling sorry for him as I felt certain he was losing his grip on reality. And then loved joining him in his outrage when it turned out he was right all along, misunderstood, misjudged, mistreated.
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The return to teaching after several weeks of counselling was not a difficult transition to make. Teaching is an easier job -- or at least it is an easier job for me because I have far more experience with it. It bores me sometimes, but other times it is a relief to be doing something I feel good at without having to try nearly so hard. Of course I cannot be satisfied doing the easier job for another twenty years until I am eligible to retire, but for February it will be just fine. (February is a short month.)
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2 comments:
So pleased you enjoyed the book. I'd say A Child in Time next maybe. Or The Cement Garden. Or anything, really.
I am sending you a kiss on the head because you are tired. I always know when you are tired because you write tiredly. But it is just as beautiful as when you write less sleepily and more awakely. ;)
I haven't not loved a book you've recommended. You are right, of course, about being tired. Sometimes looking at the big picture instead of at the moment makes me feel exhausted.
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