Saturday, July 17, 2010

I might like scars, I might like signs of life.

It's a good question about good people, and about letting people in. Yes I do have good people, but no I do not really let them in. If I let them in I do not know how to get them out later. I do not, after all, want to be colonized. So I let them near, but not in. My husband, in all cases, is the exception to the rule. He does whatever he wants even when I try to stop him, and I like it that way - for me.


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My husband understands me; I know this because in addition to knowing that he has to push - he bought me power tools for the garden. Tilling is very hard on the forearms but it's fun, and the new gas powered edger is so powerful and heavy that it requires a shoulder strap to stop it from flying out of my hands. I love it. I have decided to wrest control back from the insects I had previously stated I was sharing my yard with by letting one section go wild. I have changed my mind; the insects are rat-bastards who do not show me any appreciation whatsoever and they sting me when I am mowing. So I am evicting them, no more wilderness. I want control of everything after all, everything. I predict I will be queen of the garden by Wednesday.



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Maybe all this gardening has something to do with the fact that I have a 20 page paper due in just over a week. I like to procrastinate in ways that make me feel like I have a good reason for not doing what needs to be done. I cannot feel okay about watching tv instead of writing my paper, but I feel great about tilling.


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Though I do not like perfumes or colognes very much I like candles that smell like things. Not candles that smell like perfume or cologne, but candles that smell like spice or pine needles or cedar chips. Except then I wonder why I don't just go outside and be around those things. It's like that commercial where the people are all inside a sterile-clean, air-conditioned SUV with the windows rolled up tightly enjoying the view of the mountains out the window - and the company caption floats across the screen... "Let's face it, you belong outdoors". Har.

Which reminds me, I heard a public service announcement on the radio this morning in which I was strictly warned not to set any forest fires. I was told I had to remember three numbers:

1. The size of the fine I would be given if I started a forest fire (up to 100K)
2. The number of months I could spend in jail if I started a forest fire (up to 11, I think it was)
3. And the phone number to call and report myself if I accidentally start a forest fire (stopped listening... yeah, right.)





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4 comments:

heartinsanfrancisco said...

Yeah, after no's 1 and 2, I don't think most people would take #3 very seriously.

I love garden machinery, too, and still miss my tractor madly. For 7 years, we had an old tractor which Flip painted green and yellow and called a John Doe. It required extreme surgery every time I used it, especially after I realized I could turn it into a bulldozer and steal more and more of the woodland surrounding our property.

We finally bought a Craftsman 28 HP beauty, which I got to use only ONCE before we sold the house and included it with an entire barn full of other wondrous gadgets. Oh, the injustice! It still rankles.

Maybe we could start a chapter of Lawnmowers Anonymous.

mischief said...

Every time you talk about your tractor I have hunger pangs. I want one - even though I think I would miss doing it the regular way. I want both.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

I didn't remember mentioning it here before. Obviously, I'm obsessed. I am also lazy. Push mowers do nothing for me.

mischief said...

I'm obsessed too... the number of posts dedicated to mowing is really absurd. I loved reading about your tractor (this was only the second time and I fear I made it sound as if you have written about it over and over) and you made me want one. But my push mower would be hurt, wounded, if I stopped using it. We have an understanding, and a love-hate-love relationship.