one by one

I'm quitting my job tomorrow. That is, I'm giving notice tomorrow (2 weeks and a couple of of days) to say that June 30th is my last day.

It's been a nice job, to be honest. It's only been half-time and pretty low stress for the most part. It was never meant to become a career and in fact I never thought I'd do it for six months, but I did.

I took the job back in January, when I realised that I was going a bit batty being at home all day by myself. It was more about getting out, doing something, feeling productive, and being around people. And I enjoyed it for the most part.

But they're changing the rules on me. Effectvely, the changes will quadruple the amount of unpaid preparation time I have to put in to get myself prepared to teach every day. So it's not a little change. It's a big change.

I talked it over with S and he said I should just go ahead and quit.

It's a new thing in our lives for me to be able to do this. Throughout his education and getting-started times, I supported him. That was a lot of years. Sometimes it was kind of awful feeling like I had no choices.

But finally the sacrifices we both made, living on one income, living apart for months at a time, scrimping on things... finally this has paid off. He has a good job. And that means I can quit if I want to.

It changes the whole dynamic of working, knowing you can leave if you want to. It means you don't really get upset about things. It means you look at a job differently. When I went to work these last six months, I didn't think, I have to do this so I can pay my mortgage... I have to do this so I can pay my bills... No, instead I saw myself as a student through teaching, learning from my pupils, expanding my life experiences and spending time with people I would never otherwise have come to know. It was almost like a privilege. Knowing I was underpaid wasn't really even at issue.

And in the end, it means it's fairly easy to walk away feeling thankful for all I got from the experience.

Oh yeah, and the point. The big point I wanted to make was that it also changes us. When I was supporting us, the dynamic between us was different. He feels stronger. He feels more viable. And that's probably the best part of all.