Sometimes I purposely ignore what intuition tells me because I want to prove to myself that I'm in control of what I choose or choose not to do, that I make my decisions cognitively instead of instinctually like some kind of reptile. But when I do that I almost always make poor decisions that I have to go back and fix later.
*
Mike was here when I arrived home after work on Thursday night at 11:00 after the play. We hadn't even known he was going to be in town. It was nice to fall asleep hearing them talking downstairs. After his kids were born, Mike suddenly became self-conscious about cursing in front of me (all women, I assume), which left him with very little to say in my presence, so I didn't stay long to talk. I don't understand this new voice, why he thinks it's necessary - as if my memories of him don't exist - but I think I appreciate the sentiment behind it. I see us all at seventeen sleeping in a pile on the floor like pet store mice pressed against aquarium glass and wonder why things have to change.
*
The new courses start in about three weeks. I don't want them to start so soon. I need more time.
*
The supervisor called to say that C won't be visiting with J tomorrow because she's been hospitalized again.
*
Once in junior high I spent the night inside the school, in the girls' locker room. At first I was hiding but then I found I was locked in. I don't know how I wasn't caught there, why the caretakers didn't find me. I always think about that when I'm leaving school at the start of vacation, wonder if there could possibly be anyone hiding anywhere inside the building.
*
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment