Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Whenever I breathe out you're breathing in.

The visit was good, but three days is too long for me. I reach my limit around 2 and a half. Ideally, a visit should be two nights and two and a half days. That's for guests coming here. When I'm going somewhere else, ideal is 1 night and 1.5 days.

I'm not as sociable as much of the world.

I'm on spring break. I'm supposed to be writing so I can get paid. Instead I'm just writing for my own amusement, things that I can't charge $35 dollars an hour for. But I still can't seem to get motivated to do the paid work. Money isn't enough of a mover for me. I need something I give a rat's ass about... to write about, that is. As opposed to writing about how transport chemicals safely or how to lift ergonomically.

I felt the knot of cruelty tighten in me this afternoon, without warning. I'm displaced perhaps, but determined to live with the fact that this place isn't designed to receive what I bring. What I bring is common. It doesn't matter if it's good quality. If it's common, it's still replaceable.

I'm starving tonight. Probably because the last three days were an eating binge of restaurants and pub snacks and popcorn. I'm fortunate not to be predisposed to heaviness (of the body, hah) I've developed bad habits rather rapidly and now it's time to return to reality. Dinner at home.

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