BPPV again

The BPPV started in April of 2015, according to the notes I made, which means more than three years ago.  This summer I have returned to Bikram yoga more fully than I ever have since then.  For the first time in three years I have been doing full inversions, and even being able to get through the whole series without really thinking about vertigo at all.

This morning I woke up, sat up, and felt a weird wave of vertigo.  Not like the first time (the first time it was so strong I could not walk and had to cling to Shawn just to get across the room without falling down).  Not like that.  Just a wave, washed over and passed, almost gone before I was able to fully register it had even happened.

It leaves me wondering if it really occurred at all.

But it also scares me.  (Vertigo is a strangely terrifying thing; it doesn't seem like a person would be so afraid of dizziness when it's just a word.  Dizziness doesn't seem that scary until it's happening and you cannot stop it.)

We went on a hike this morning anyway, as we planned.  I scanned the ground the whole time, looking for evidence that I was relapsing.  Couldn't find it.  Except for the fact that when you are hyper-alert looking for it, every sensation feels like it could be something.

I did some Epley maneuvers.  Felt strange.  A little wobbly.  But not like the other time.  The ceiling stayed up and the floor stayed down.

So I'm not really sure what's going on.  Decompensation, perhaps.  But why?

Or if it's actually a relapse, it's far less serious than last time.

Tomorrow I'm going to yoga anyway.  Treat it with indifference, the Winter Prairie doctor told me once.  (He was referring to a virus, but I think it still applies.)

I really really really really hope it's just decompensation, and I can push my stupid little pea-brain to fix it.

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